Loss and the Quiet Reminders

The heat feels oppressive.

The gardens are full.

Corn stalks  and tobacco  block my view at nearly every stop sign.

The kids bickering is overwhelming.

I freeze in the bookstore as the air-conditioning is blowing at full blast.

All is normal.  But my heart-it breaks all over again.

It’s July.   These summer days bring back memories from a year ago.  A time when suffering was kicking into full gear.  Days seemed longer.  Life was shorter.  So many things were unsaid, but known.

I find myself at another grief anniversary.  Not a birthday or a holiday.  This one is marked by all the normalcy. The heat, the summer bounty, the beach vacations, the carrying on of every day life.  A life that last summer was anything but  normal, every day moments.

Grief is a funny thing.  It cannot be neatly packaged.  It will always be there to remind you…”Hey, remember me?”

Yes, I remember.

So for healing sake, I name it.  Hello, grief.  Hello, again, to all we have lost.  I have not forgotten you.  I have not forgotten last summer and the days where we began to fully understand that the end of life was near.  The days where the clock seemed to tick loudly.

I remember you.

I also remember many happy moments.  But today, I remember the heartache.  A friend gone much much too soon.


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