It was a long lonely run this morning.
I had put it off as long as I could, but I knew it had to get done. So finally, I threw on my running clothes and headed down. I wanted to give up, so many times. I’ve only ever trained for a half marathon before and I never included a run longer than 10 miles. So my first 11 mile training run happened, but it wasn’t pretty. It was on a treadmill, in a basement, and I was all alone. Now, I had my music and we have a tv down there, so I did have some entertainment. But it took everything I had not to give up at 7, then 8, then 8.4, then 8.7, then 9….. you get it. I so wanted out.
I’m not athletic. I have always STUNK at sports. My sister kicked ass in cross country so I didn’t even consider that I could run too. But, after that third child I knew I needed something. My sister and cousin were training for a half marathon at the time and so I thought, alright, why not?
And I did it.
And then I did it again.
It’s so weird how that works. Something so hard and taxing on your body (which you absolutely hate at times) can become such an important part of your life. As much as I dread my long runs, I would feel so much worse if I couldn’t do them. Those who run, you know what I mean?
So right now I can barely move my legs. I know the house is about to fill up with kids and I can’t just shout orders from my bed (I’ve tried). And I’m tired, so tired. But I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Running keeps me healthy. Running keeps me sane. Running keeps me from going under.
I’m not the best, but I have improved greatly. It isn’t about anyone else but me and the road. You have good days and bad days, but at the end of the day- you feel so much better at all you’ve accomplished. I’ll never be the runner my sister is, but it isn’t about that anymore- and it never was.
So here we go, it’s real FOR REAL marathon training time. I may need to be dragged over the finish line. But the hard work is now.
Literally, the hard work is right now.
I need to stand up.
(My little bro Mike waiting for Drew and Brian, mile 25 at the Detroit Free Press Marathon)