Before I sound like I’m just bragging about my kids, let me say this one thing….
What I share on the blog, and any social media, is only the tip of the iceberg. I’m pretty sure you know that, but I feel like it has to be said. What I share are the things that have just made me think and do not indicate anything about me as a parent or who my kids are. Because as I’m sure you all have concluded. I’m pretty much perfect. (Said no one about me, ever.)
Lessons learned from my daughter, here’s a big one.
If you don’t know us, you may not know that my girl tends to get sick. Whatever germ is out there, she will catch it. So let’s just say she’s not expecting any attendance awards at the end of the year. When she’s ill, she’s on her back ill. When she’s recovering, it takes days.
If you’re a fellow student at her school, she may not make for a great group project partner. She’s definitely a hard worker, she’s got that going. But when the winter hits, you may end up doing that in class project on your own. Not so fun.
This happened last year. And the person who got paired with her wasn’t happy. She let people know she wasn’t happy. So through Abbey’s friends, Abbey also was aware this girl didn’t appreciate her so much. I don’t know the details, but it didn’t sound great. Walking in after being gone for several days wasn’t the best.
So here’s the thing, Abbey cares about carrying her share of the load. She wants a good grade and will do what she can. But she shrugs off what you’re saying about her. Not that it doesn’t affect her. It just doesn’t rule her. She’ll deal with the work issue as a work issue.
This person is irritated with me = This person is mad. I will do my share of the work as I am supposed to.
For her Mom it goes like this-
This person is irritated with me = I question my value as a person and I won’t be able to function until I can get myself out of depression and earn back your approval.
Maybe, a little.
This theme goes from there. This girl of mine isn’t interested in social media or anyone’s likes. She’s not getting energy from the approval of people around her. Of course she wants to be loved and is so grateful for friends. They have squabbles, they fix them. Her self worth hasn’t plummeted. If her friend hurt her, she’s hurt. But she’s not waiting on the world for the thumbs up.
I didn’t teach her this but I wish I could say I did. It’s possible she got it from her dad, he is much more likely to not care about other folks ideas of him.
Thanks for being you.
Thanks for teaching me.
Thanks for loving life so fiercely.
I’m so glad we are in it together.